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I am alone
Upon the throne.
Door locked.
Peace.

Steps outside the door
Soft and stealthy
Creek, creek, creek.
They go up the stairs.

Overhead a cry
suprise, fright
Pounding feet
Down the stairs

The nob jiggles,
Pounding, pounding, pounding,
A terrible scream.

I am safe, nothing can touch me.
Blood runs under the door.
Not my best poetry to be sure, but this piece was begging to be written, so thats what I did. I can't deny a begging piece of work.
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:iconpaladin343:
Paladin343 Featured By Owner Nov 22, 2006  Hobbyist General Artist
creepy, but interesting.
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:iconkuroinami:
kuroinami Featured By Owner Nov 23, 2006  Hobbyist Writer
Heh ^^; Yeah, its a weird little poem..
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:iconpaladin343:
Paladin343 Featured By Owner Nov 23, 2006  Hobbyist General Artist
sometimes that happens.
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:iconkuroinami:
kuroinami Featured By Owner Nov 24, 2006  Hobbyist Writer
:shrug: I suppose
Reply
:icongifts-raemanzu:
gifts-raemanzu Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2005  Student Writer
Wow, this is great! I like the whole feel behind this, really great, and a very simple but cool story.
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:iconkuroinami:
kuroinami Featured By Owner Sep 29, 2005  Hobbyist Writer
lol, thank you^^
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:iconomnicontemplation:
Omnicontemplation Featured By Owner Sep 27, 2005
Well, first thing I noticed... creak is spelled with an a when used onomatopoeically, also, in both uses of the triple word, I think periods might help you drive it in a bit more, rather than commas... typo in surprise, it's missing an r... ...knob has a k on the beginning :) ... good job, all in all... scary poem though, as far as content. :)
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:iconkuroinami:
kuroinami Featured By Owner Sep 27, 2005  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you for the comments, they are much appreciated.
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:iconomnicontemplation:
Omnicontemplation Featured By Owner Sep 27, 2005
np.
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:icondumahdie:
dumahdie Featured By Owner Sep 26, 2005  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
*throws head back and laughs maniacally* i wish i was the one who wrote this...*jealous* :) sweet stuff, punk n_~
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:icondumahdie:
dumahdie Featured By Owner Sep 26, 2005  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
nob=knob. i like the letter k-- and for good reason n_n Kairo, Kay ((middle name of mine)), friend Kiume...yeah! :D this is good--like yummy good xD love the blood under the door (;
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:iconkuroinami:
kuroinami Featured By Owner Sep 26, 2005  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you, I'm glad you enjoyed it^^
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:iconladyshadowblade:
LadyShadowblade Featured By Owner Sep 25, 2005
Yeah......I see it now.......::shivers fiercely and hides under the covers::
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:iconkuroinami:
kuroinami Featured By Owner Sep 25, 2005  Hobbyist Writer
:giggle: Its not that bad silly. Only a poem.
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:iconladyshadowblade:
LadyShadowblade Featured By Owner Sep 25, 2005
::peeks out from under the covers:: Okay...:phew:.
Reply
:iconkuroinami:
kuroinami Featured By Owner Sep 25, 2005  Hobbyist Writer
lol, silly words on a screen cannot reach out and grab you^^ (even if it feels like they might.)
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:iconladyshadowblade:
LadyShadowblade Featured By Owner Sep 25, 2005
Lol, just being a silly little meadowlark.
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:iconkuroinami:
kuroinami Featured By Owner Sep 25, 2005  Hobbyist Writer
Aw, you're not silly! If you are, then I am sillier than you are.
And speaking of Meadowlarks, are you ever going to write a sequal to your Song of the Silent Siren series?
Reply
:iconladyshadowblade:
LadyShadowblade Featured By Owner Sep 26, 2005
Yeah, one day. It's kind of on the back burner because I'm in rehearsal for a show 20 hours a week.
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:iconkuroinami:
kuroinami Featured By Owner Sep 26, 2005  Hobbyist Writer
Ah, I know that feeling. Marching band really cuts into my free time...
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(1 Reply)
:iconladyshadowblade:
LadyShadowblade Featured By Owner Sep 24, 2005
:shivers: This is creepy. I kind of read it as like a metaphor to writing. When one is writing, one is temporarily saved from the outside world, despite the ever nearing dangers of it.
Call me a weirdo. :evillaugh:
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:iconkuroinami:
kuroinami Featured By Owner Sep 24, 2005  Hobbyist Writer
Wow, I would never have thought of it that way, but as you say it it makes perfect sense. No one seems to have caught the double meaning of the last two lines, though.
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:iconladyshadowblade:
LadyShadowblade Featured By Owner Sep 25, 2005
It was very well written.
To me, the last two lines represent danger that is approaching, or pain, or any number of harmful things, and yet the writer feels safe thought it's so close.
Call me crazy. :evillaugh:
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:iconkuroinami:
kuroinami Featured By Owner Sep 25, 2005  Hobbyist Writer
Heh, once again I didn't think of it that way, but it still makes sense.
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:iconladyshadowblade:
LadyShadowblade Featured By Owner Sep 25, 2005
What were your intentions for the piece?
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:iconkuroinami:
kuroinami Featured By Owner Sep 25, 2005  Hobbyist Writer
For it to be purely horror actually.
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:iconladyshadowblade:
LadyShadowblade Featured By Owner Sep 25, 2005
......hmmm......:shivers in comprehension:....brrr....
Reply
:iconkuroinami:
kuroinami Featured By Owner Sep 25, 2005  Hobbyist Writer
lol, yeah, I got the idea for this while I was babysitting again. Try reading it again now that you understand what I am saying and see what you think of the last two lines.
Reply
:iconkismet-neko:
Kismet-Neko Featured By Owner Sep 24, 2005
All in all, I enjoyed the subject and how it was depicted without speaking too much.
I do however, wish to comment that you may desire to stick with one particular format throughout the poem. You begin ryming, then cease to do so, you set a sort of meter with 'creek creek creek' and 'pounding pounding poundning' but it is only for two stanzas. Though, you needn't listen to me, duck, I'm no Emily Dickenson.
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:iconkuroinami:
kuroinami Featured By Owner Sep 24, 2005  Hobbyist Writer
It rhymned? Crap, I didn't mean for it to do that.
I'm glad you're not Emily Dickenson.
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:iconkismet-neko:
Kismet-Neko Featured By Owner Sep 24, 2005
Only the first couple lines.
Oh, and why not? I rather like her writing.
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:iconkuroinami:
kuroinami Featured By Owner Sep 24, 2005  Hobbyist Writer
I still didn't mean to do it.
I liked her writing until my teacher forced me to imitate it...
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:iconkuroinami:
kuroinami Featured By Owner Sep 24, 2005  Hobbyist Writer
*twitches* It was HORRIBLE. This happens to be the same teacher I wanted to see go to hell, remember? Yeah, I really didn't like that assignment.
Reply
:iconkismet-neko:
Kismet-Neko Featured By Owner Sep 24, 2005
Eh, well.
Odd. It would seem it ought to be the opposite. I didn't appreciate Milton until I attempted his style. But horses for course and all that.
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:iconkuroinami:
kuroinami Featured By Owner Sep 24, 2005  Hobbyist Writer
*twitches* It was HORRIBLE. This happens to be the same teacher I wanted to see go to hell, remember? Yeah, I really didn't like that assignment.
Reply
:iconkismet-neko:
Kismet-Neko Featured By Owner Sep 24, 2005
THAT teacher. Oh you poor dear. *pat pat*
Which reminds me, I have yet to make Sardielle ask God about sending her there.
Reply
:iconkuroinami:
kuroinami Featured By Owner Sep 24, 2005  Hobbyist Writer
Yes, THAT teacher. *shudders*
Please do, it would give me much satisfaction.
Reply
(1 Reply)
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