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February 12, 2007
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Full title of this deviation is "How Rowling Could End the Series (but probably won’t)"

True predictions shall be bolded

~Use the room of requirement to get everything they need
     ~Ask for horocruxes, get a map
     ~Ask to kill Voldemort, get some sort of a weapon
     ~Etc.

~ A Magical Venus Fly Trap eats Voldemort on the battle field. It was tended lovingly by Hagrid and Neville

~Voldemort is defeated by cheering charms/any other happy type charms.

~We finally find out where conjured things come from.
     ~(Remember those socks you lost in the wash last week?)

~Dumbledore’s Army declares war on Laura Mallory.

~Have Harry wake up and realize it was all a dream, there never was a Voldemort.
~Have Voldemort wake up and realize it was all a dream, there never was a Harry Potter.
~Have Tom Riddle wake up and suddenly have new direction in his life.

~Have the entire series turn out to have been a lecture in Professor Binns’ class.
~ “And that,” said Professor Binns, “Was how You-Know-Who was defeated.  Any questions?”  He looked around.  As usual, the entire class was asleep.

~Voldemort pulls a Darth Vader at the last second:  “Harry, I am your father.”

~J.K. Rowling decides that she doesn’t have enough characters, and so introduces a new one she found in one of those fan fictions online.
~  The new student walked to the front of the classroom.  “Hello, my name is Mary Sue.  I have amazing long silver hair, and gorgeous sapphire eyes you can’t help but stare into.  For the rest of the year I will be the primary love interest of Harry, Draco, Ron, and any other character I deem even remotely attractive.  If you don’t like it, come you’d better come duel me now.  I promise that I’ll go easy on you since my magic is ten times stronger that Voldemort’s, and my brain power surpasses Hermione’s by a lot too.”

~ J.K. Rowling gets tired of her genre and switches to erotic fiction.
~ “Harry, kiss me now,” demanded Cho Chang, determined never to leave him again (Next three chapters censored for content).
~ J.K. Rowling gets tired of her genre and switches to Doctor Seuss rhymes.
~Harry’s wand fired,
Wazzam, Wazzum, Kazzap
But he missed and hit Ron
Who shouted, “Oh, snap!”
~ J.K. Rowling gets tired of her genre and switches to Shakespearian tragedy.
~Rocks fall, everyone dies.

~ Crookshanks attempts to eat Pigwidgeon, Ron's pet owl, but the bird turns out to be Cornelius Fudge in disguise.

~Hermione does the smart thing:  “Accio earmuffs!  Accio mandrakes!”

~Harry poses nude for photographs.
~Wait a minute…

~Lupin is caught without a collar and taken to the pound.
~Sirius Black returns as “Sirius the White.”
~Wormtail spreads the plague through the DE camp.  Everyone dies.
~James’s true resting place is revealed to be the wall of Voldemort’s big game trophy room.

~Harry decides to stop being emo and just get on with his life.
~Ron gets in touch with his feminine side (Ron in pink robes?)
~Hermione dumps Ron for Harry.
~Malfoy kills Harry.
~Crab and Goyle get into Oxford.
~We’ll let you decide whether or not there was magic involved with that one.
~Neville organizes the students into a rebellion and takes over as the main character of the book.
~Dumbledore really is the giant squid!
~*cricket cricket cricket*

~The Slytherines are deemed..how should we say this..too evil? And kicked out of Hogwarts.
(Need one for Gryffendore!)
~Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw are revealed to have been pitting S&G against one another all along so that they could quietly take over the world in the mean time.
Full title of this deviation is "How Rowling Could End the Series (but probably won’t)"

So a friend and I are making a presentation for a club we are in. We have a fairly good start, but we wanted input from other people. So these are humorous things that could be in the seventh book. If you can think of anything to add to the list, please do so, or if you don't think something on the list is funny, tell me! I want this to be a good presentation. Also, if you add something, tell me if you want credit, I'll be happy to add your name to the end of the slide show.


Edit: Now that the book has come out, I look back on this and wonder how the heck we guessed everything we did. Anyways, as it said above, predictions prooved true are bolded.
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:iconnut-tree:
nut-tree Featured By Owner Nov 22, 2009  Hobbyist General Artist
cant believe this hasnt got more faves , its AMAZING!!!!!!!!!!!!! specially like the serius the white one!!!!!
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:iconkuroinami:
kuroinami Featured By Owner Dec 13, 2009  Hobbyist Writer
Glad you enjoyed it :)
Thanks for the :+fav:
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:iconnut-tree:
nut-tree Featured By Owner Dec 14, 2009  Hobbyist General Artist
:blowkiss: :D
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:icongifts-raemanzu:
gifts-raemanzu Featured By Owner Sep 13, 2007  Student Writer
yay for stuff like this XD you rock.
Reply
:iconkuroinami:
kuroinami Featured By Owner Sep 13, 2007  Hobbyist Writer
Heh, you really are behind, arn't you ;p
Reply
:icongifts-raemanzu:
gifts-raemanzu Featured By Owner Sep 13, 2007  Student Writer
uh yes ^^;
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:iconkuroinami:
kuroinami Featured By Owner Sep 13, 2007  Hobbyist Writer
lol, have no fear, I'm sure I'm farther behind than you are.
Reply
:icontakjak:
TakJak Featured By Owner Feb 15, 2007  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
That. Was. AWESOME. :+fav:
Reply
:iconkuroinami:
kuroinami Featured By Owner Feb 15, 2007  Hobbyist Writer
lol, glad you enjoyed it XD
Reply
:iconlahere:
lahere Featured By Owner Feb 14, 2007  Hobbyist Writer
That had me in giggles for a while.. just wondering who is Luara Mallory? I like the venus fly trap idea lol. Well done =]
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